M.E.N.D. 1997 Guestbook

The following entries were submitted by guests during 1997.  After reading these entries, you can click here to close the book.

Jennifer Saake 

Jul 5, 1997 · 22:01

Dear Rebekah & Other MEND Ladies, Thank you for letting the Lord use you and the pain you have faced through the loss of your precious babies, to minister to the hurting hearts of other women. May God continue to bless you ministry. Blessings! Jennifer Saake Mommy to Noel Alexis (lost to miscarriage 12/27/94) Director, Hannah's Prayer Ministries Christian Support for Fertility Challenges www.quiknet.com/~hannahs

Email Address: hannahs@quiknet.com

Kathy Hewitt · from Florida

Jul 11, 1997 · 22:28

Thank you for this website. I just lost my first baby three weeks ago today. This has been the most difficult experience of my life, but it somehow helps me to know that some of the feelings I am experiencing are normal. Most of the people around me are treating me as though I should be getting over this... I can't imagine when that is going to happen. Thank you for letting me know I am not alone.

Email Address: khewitt@magicnet.net

Kathleen Santana · from California

Jul 21, 1997 · 01:36

What a wonderful organization!!! My husband and I lost our 13 day old son, Daniel, in Oct 1996. Its great to know I'm not alone with my feelings. He was a beautiful child and we were fortunate to have those 13 days. We were never able to bring him home, but now he is at home with God until we meet again. I love you son!! Love, Kathy (Mom) & Mike (dad) santanas@lightspeed.net

Email Address: santanas@lightspeed.net

Linda Kirby-Kojich · from Indiana

Aug 9, 1997 · 19:52

This site is unique! I have found other sites dealing with the loss of a child, and some for losses by miscarriage and stillbirth. This is the first one I have found that deals with neonatal death. Thank you for this. I feel that our loss is different from those who lost a child that lived for years and I feel different from those who had a miscarriage or stillbirth. I'm glad there is a place for us. Thank you, Linda Mom to Baby JJ 2/19/96--3/9/96

Email Address: bobski@webtv.net

Jean & Gary Hill · from Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, Canada

Aug 11, 1997 · 08:09

We have just lost our second child through miscarriage into the 14th week. We named him Jonathon David Hill. We found that as soon as we named him that the grieving process began for both of us. Thanks for your web page it has brought comfort to me.

Email Address: j.hill@sk.sympatico.ca

Susan Williams · from Louisville, KY

Aug 16, 1997 · 14:53

Our daughter, Hannah Jo, was born 4/4/96 and died 4/11/96 from complications associated with Trisomy 18. She is our third child and only daughter. Her big brothers Benjamin and Nathan miss her very much, as do her parents, grandparents and many aunts, uncles, cousins and friends. Hannah was born after a normal pregnancy. She was full term and weighed only 4 1/2 lbs. This was our first clue that something was wrong. After a simple blood test, our fears were confirmed. With the love and support of many wonderful people, we were able to bring Hannah home when she was just 2 days old. She had many visitors and received all the love a child needs. She died peacefully in her sleep early in the morning on April 11. Her struggles have ended, but our seem endless. I would love to be in touch with others who have experienced such a loss. Feel free to write. Wishing us all peace. Susan Williams

Email Address: DWilli5756@aol.com

Stephanie Wright · from Columbus, Georgia

Aug 19, 1997 · 23:35

I am greatful for web pages such as this. I hope one day to develop one also. I lost one of my twin daughter's four hours after open heart surgery (HLHS) at four days old. I have found some peace through the web after finding pages such as yours. Thank you, Stephanie Mommy to: Trevor 5, Kristen 2, and Kayleigh 2 in heaven.

Email Address: MOM2ANGEL@aol.com

Delores Ward · from Prunedale, California

Aug 24, 1997 · 00:21

Am looking for sites to find information that may help my daughter and son-in-law with the lost of 2 of their 4 children. They have a new 7 week old son that has been in the NICU in Washington state since birth We do not know if he will continue to be strong and live, he is Surfactant Protein B deficient. The doctors now believe that is what was wrong with their 1 and 3 children. They have a one very healthy daughter age 3.5 The other two babies died at 2 weeks and 5 weeks......It has been very difficult for them and all of us...Looking for sites to find info on Heart-Lung and Surfactant Protein B. thank you Delores

Email Address: dmward@worldnet.att.net

Christopher and Lisa Pike · from San Diego, CA

Aug 29, 1997 · 15:46

Our hearts go out to all of you bereaved parents. It is impossible for friends and family to understand the pain and anguish that parents go through after the death of a child. The fact that the child was stillborn or miscarried is of no consolation. Our son Christopher was stillborn (cord accident) on Feb. 1, 1997, only two weeks from his due date. Our grief is ongoing, though it becomes a little more manageable with the passing days. My wife and I survived the nightmare only through the grace of God and our love for each other. It has been over 6 months now, and I still cry almost daily. Some souls have no need for more than a cursory visit to this world. Christopher is one of those. It is we who are left behind who have yet to become enlightened.

Email Address: cgpike@cts.com

Lynne Wells Murphy · from Rockland, ME

Aug 30, 1997 · 11:17

I lost my son 10-20-94, he was stillborn, his name is Patrick Wells Murphy. This is a very nice place to visit

Email Address: WhtLupine@aol.com

Crista Wesenger · from Guelph, Ontario Canada

Sep 1, 1997 · 11:48

It breaks my heart to see all of the pain that people endure, but at the same time, it's comforting to know we are not alone. Our first child, Elijah Ross was stillborn on July 10, 1997. Prior to Elijah's birth, I had never discussed stillbirth or known anyone who has gone through it. Now, in our circle of caring and supportive family and friends, my husband David and I have become "experts". Thank you for giving us a place to look to when we're feeling alone in our sadness.

Email Address: dwesenger@gesp.com

Bonnie Randolph · from Laurel, Maryland

Sep 7, 1997 · 09:45

Three years ago, my infant twin son David Thomas died in my arms. Life as I knew it, ceased to exist. Left was a woman forever changed, heart and soul broken. One of the most difficult things to endure in losing a child, is to go through the greiving process alone. With all of the family and friends that I have in my life, none had lost a child so young. I had no one to comfort me, had to go through the agony of my grief alone for about four months, until I was able to find the support that was out there. No one can help you with your grief unless they themselves have experienced the same type of loss. No you can't "IMAGINE" the pain that is associated with losing a child, nor would you want to. I am thankful for the M.E.N.D newsletters. They have been a saving grace when I have been so down. It doesn't matter at what age you loss your child, your hopes, dreams and wishes died when your child died, and only another parent can share that pain with you. I am still trying to heal. I still have my "good" days and other days when all I do is cry, cry because I miss my David so much! Allow me to help share in your pain and your memories. Allow me to be a shoulder for you to cry on, to vent with, to laugh. It is my turn to help those who need it, as others helped me when I needed it!

Email Address: mompg@nmaa.org

Theresa Cunningham · from Lake Wales, FL

Sep 15, 1997 · 02:38

I am labor and delivery nurse and work with many moms that lose their babies for one reason or other. Its great to know we have another resorse to help these moms. I to have lost a child before birth.

Email Address: 74152.1177@compuserve.com

Gloria Kunder · from Lebanon, PA

Sep 16, 1997 · 17:33

My husband David & I lost our first child--Derek David--on Jan. 17th, 1996 (when labor was induced because of no heartbeat) at 18 weeks of pregnancy. There was a true knot in the umbilical cord and Maternal Floor Infarction of the Placenta. We became pregnant again in May of '96 and after 33.5 weeks of carrying our daughter--Samantha Jo--I went into labor, thinking everything was fine, only to find no heartbeat again and we lost her too, on Jan. 4th, 1997. Another Maternal Floor Infarction of the Placenta. We are planning on trying another pregnancy, with the aid of perinatologists (this time), and even though we are given a 50% percent chance of having a successful pregnancy, we need all the positive support that we can get. I attend monthly SHARE meetings in my town, and even though there are some GREAT people in the group, I feel 'alone' in my experience because of losing both of my babies. I have no living children of my own. Anyone with a similar problem, or anyone that can help educate us on this problem, please feel free to contact us. I have been through extensive blood tests to try to figure out why this happens, but we have discovered nothing. I am grateful for finding this website and I can feel each and every ones pain. The only thing that gets me through each day is the knowledge that God has a Plan....Sincerely, 'Glo'

Email Address: davek@nbn.net

Patricia Howard · from Carrollton, TX

Sep 17, 1997 · 13:48

Recently suffered 1st trimester loss. Looking around for resources/support in my area.

Email Address: trish@connect.net

Janell Howe · from State College, PA

Sep 18, 1997 · 13:16

I lost my son Luke William on 4-3-97. He was stillborn I was in my 24th week and I have Premature Rupture of the Membranes. If anyone else has experienced this please contact me. I really would like to talk to someone else who has experienced this situation.

Email Address: jah31@psu.edu

Esther Tilghman · from Lesville, LA

Sep 20, 1997 · 19:43

Dear M.E.N.D., In 1993 I lost my second child, I almost lost my first son also. Both of my boys were born premature . Trey my second son lived for over a month. Even though it's been 4 years I still think about it like it was yesterday. I am so glad to see that there are other people who understand how I feel. Thanks for being here. God Bless!! Feel free to write. Sincerely, Esther Tilghman

Email Address: allen@worldnetla.net

Katrina

Sep 24, 1997 · 12:53

I just wanted to thank the people involved for this website. It is wonderful and full of reasuring stories that life does go on. Maybe not the way you expected it to go but you do survive. My daughter Christina Elise was stillborn on October 20, 1996. Its been difficult coming up on her first bithday/anniversay. She is the most beautiful little girl I have ever seen. At least I know that she is with God and that we will be with her someday and thats when I will give her the biggest hug I've been wanting to give her since I came home from the hospital. Does anyone know of any websites that are geared to the fathers? Ya see my husbands been my rock and is always trying to be strong for me. I just worry about him. Any info would be appreciated. Thanks Trina:)

Email Address: krapposelli@ets.org

Margie · from Nevada

Sep 28, 1997 · 11:03

I found your site through the Christian Pregnancy Loss web-site linklist. Thanks so much for being there for moms like me who have lost babies! Margie

Email Address: none

Kimberly Loyz · from Merced, California

Oct 6, 1997 · 05:10

Thank-you! I've read so many touching stories and experiences. My son Tyler Branden was stillborn at full term 3 days after his due date because of a cord accident. He is very loved and misssed and always will be. I have since had another son who fills my life with joy, but my heart will always ache for Tyler! It's nice to know there are people out there who understand that.Because there are so many who don't! In memory of Tyler Branden stillborn January 11,1996 I love you Ty!!!! Kim Mother of one in heaven and one on earth.

Email Address: ttlotz@telis.org

Nancy Fasoldt · from Syracuse, NY

Oct 8, 1997 · 20:29

Thanks for being here tonight. I've been writing a book about pregnancy loss (and how insignificant our loss is considered by so many people), but have repeatedly shelved my project because I became emotionally shattered. My Emma died as she was born and although I thought of the book as my greatest gift to her, I just couldn't keep going. Tonight I tried to write again and, as usual, the grief overwhelmed me. That's when I stumbled across this site and found hope. Thank you. Emma's story and the story of so many other children will get told. (Let's just hope it will get published!) Nancy

Email Address: nfasoldt@dreamscape.com

Stephanie Russell · from Colorado Springs, CO

Oct 9, 1997 · 01:20

Now I must graciously thank the person who told me about this website...I never realized anything like these websites existed...My son Noble Ragale died on September the 27th 1997...the same day he was born...his father and I love him beyond words and miss him emmensly...thank you for providing these places, I need them. ~Stephanie and James Russell Weida

Email Address: NOBLEbliss@aol.com

Shana Mills · from Pompano Beach, FL

Oct 11, 1997 · 20:17

My husband and I lost our daughter (our first child) due to complications from a diaphragmatic hernia. She was 12 days old when died and she died in my arms. My life is so different now -- you learn what is important in life and what isn't worth getting upset over. I try to focus on how happy my husband and I were when I was pregnant with her. As much as I didn't want Hayley Caitlin to die, having her in my life and experiencing what I have, I can say that it truly has made me a better person in many ways.

Email Address: J-SMills@worldnet.att.net

Ann Marie Martin · from Huntsville, AL

Oct 12, 1997 · 12:33

In loving memory of Anthony Patrick Martin, Twin of Anna Louise Martin. Born: 7-2-96 Twin A: Anna Louise Martin 12:41 a.m. 1 lb. 7 oz. 12 1/2 inches. Twin B: Anthony Patrick Martin 12:44 a.m. 1 lb. 8oz. 13 inches. Date of Death 7-20-96 GOD GAVE US TWO ANGELS, ONE FOR HEAVEN AND ONE FOR EARTH.

Email Address: mbritton11

Kim Brennan · from Liberal, Kansas

Oct 13, 1997 · 16:04

Just found this website as I was browsing the net for information for parents who have suffered stillbirths. I am the local chapter leader for The Compassionate Friends and though I have lost a child to death I am not well versed in helping parents with neonatal loss. Any help that I can find for these parents. In the last week alone I have made contact with two moms who have experienced stillbirths, one for the second time. She is having coping problems as you could expect.

Email Address: kbrennan@pld.com

Kristi · from Tennessee

Oct 14, 1997 · 23:40

This is a wonderful site! Being a mother of stillbirth daughter, Andrea, on 11-07-91 I know the pain and depth of the loss. I also suffered 2 miscarriages in 1992. I too would like to help those who are suffering. Anyone who just would like to chat may email me at the above address. I also have a memorial page, that I would love to list anyone's child or children who have gone on home to the Lord. http://www.geocities.com/heartland/prairie/ 8424/heaven.html. If you visit please check our Andrea's page a tribute to my daughter.

Email Address: kristidan@juno.com

Theodore Lotz · from Merced, CA

Oct 15, 1997 · 02:11

Hello everybody. My wife and I lost our first son, Tyler Branden, on 11-Jan-96, due to a cord accident. It took quite a while before we could even start to function like normal people again. There are times even now, as Ty's 2d birthday approaches, that I'll just break down crying. Having no parental support didn't help, but having people like ya'll has really helped us, especially Kim (my loving wife). Thank you for any support you have given, or may give in the future. We LOVE you, Ty, and wish you were here to play with yur brother! Hugs and kisses. Dad Tyler was stillborn 11-Jan-96, 3 days after his due date, due to cord accident. We were blessed though by his now 10-month-old brother, Theodore Thomas II, who's probably bigger than Ty would be today.

Email Address: ttlotz@telis.org

Vickie Lykins · from Oklahoma City, OK

Oct 28, 1997 · 11:13

I think your site is great. I wish there would have been something like this when I lost my son in 1989. I don't know if he is still considered an infant, or if I can join your organization. He was 3 years old when he died. I didn't even start to deal with his death until my mother was killed in the Okla City Bombing in 1995. I still haven't done real well with it. Anyway, your site is great.

Email Address: vclykins@po1.tinker.af.mil

Julie Wilson

Oct 29, 1997 · 13:28

I had a hysterotomy on October 16, 1997. I was about four months pregnant and our baby was diagnosed with anencephaly/ Acrania. She lived about ten minutes and died in her fathers hands. We buried her last Thursday, the 23rd. Tomorrow it will be two weeks since she was born and a week since we buried her. If you would like to know more please E-mail me at the above address. Thank You.

Email Address: JA-Wilson@wiu.edu

Donna Sickler · from Newburg, Missouri

Nov 4, 1997 · 01:36

My husband and I recently lost our 5 1/2 week old daughter. Dannah Raye was born on September 7, 1997. She weighed 5lbs. 4ozs. and was 17 1/2 inches long. She was born 3 weeks early. When she was born she was having difficulty breathing, so she was flown to Children's Hospital in St. Louis. She was in the NICU for 11 days. Finally she was well enough to come home. She was born with Patent Ductus Arteriosus. She was doing wonderful at home eveything was going great. Then one night she had trouble breathing, she was taken to the local hospital where she went into cardiac arrest. She died on October 15,1997. She was our angel. Thank God we have a wonderful healthy 3 year old son named Dylan. He is what keeps us going. Before Dannah was born, I had a blighted ovum miscarriage. (This is where no fetus is formed.) Even though no "real" baby was there, I felt that child. I had gone 10 weeks thinking I was pregnant. So Dylan has had to suffer the loss of two babies. It is hard for him because he "wants his baby sister back". We are not planning to have more children. We are content to hold Dylan and the beautiful memories of sweet baby girl, Dannah and the memory of our lost little angel. If you have endured a loss from sudden cardiac arrest please e-mail me. I would like to hear from you. In loving memory of our two babies. Baby Sickler, miscarriage May 19, 1996. Dannah Raye Sickler, our beatiful baby girl - born September 7, 1997 - died October 15, 1997.

Email Address: terra@fidnet.com

Erica Joslin · from Ypsilanti, MI

Nov 18, 1997 · 19:26

I quit feeling one of my triplets on my birthday. The following day an ultrasound revealed he had no heartbeat. That day, September 4, 1997, I had an urgent c-section. I was 33 weeks. We were aiming for 32 weeks but when I made it that far with no problems except pre-eclampsia I decided to carry them as long as possible. We never found out the reason for his death. Thank you for this wonderful web site. It is good to know we're not alone.

Email Address: ajoslin@a.imap.itd.umich.edu

Barry Goldberg · from Roslyn, NY

Dec 1, 1997 · 12:00

i lost my precious son three years ago to neonatal death due to tratalogy of fallot. i am just overwhelmed still and need something to help.

Email Address: bgoldb6596

Marty and Gail Luning · from Sydney, Australia

Dec 6, 1997 · 18:19

We visited your M.E.N.D site after visiting the M.I.S.S site. We lost our first born son William Russell at 31 weeks still born on 3rd December.We don't know why. William weighed only 300 grams (10.58 ounces) We are devastated. We are an internet memorial to him at http://griefnet.org/memorials.dir/wluning1297.html

Email Address: bunnyman@ozemail.com.au

Kris · from Whitehorse, Yukon, Canada

Dec 7, 1997 · 00:11

I have lost 3 pregnancies all in the second trimester; two in 1995 and most recently August 3, 1997. My oldest child, almost four, still asks when "his baby is coming". I am finding this difficult to deal with on a daily basis. We have finally been diagnosed as incompetant cervix. If there is anyone out there who has experienced a similar situation and has gone on to carry a successful pregnancy I would sure love to hear from you. My partner finds it all to difficult to deal with and I feel very alone. Any help greatly appreciated.

Email Address: rbruneau@internorth.com

Cindy Carrell · from Stephenville, TX

Dec 9, 1997 · 11:19

GOD BLESS YOU.

Email Address: CHRIST.FOR.YOU@MAILEXCITE.COM

Shanna Dale

Dec 10, 1997 · 10:07

Two angels in heaven.

Email Address: fjt007@mail.connect.more.net

Marilyn Sager · from Richmond, VA

Dec 12, 1997 · 19:09

I cannot tell you how I feel after reading the entire guest book. My baby girl was stillborn on November 15, 1997 due to abruptio placenta. This was a phenomenon I had no idea about and never even thought that anything like that would happen to me. My world came crashing down when I went to the hospital in labor thinking that I was about to deliver my beautiful baby girl and not hearing a heartbeat on the fetal monitor. When the ultrasound confirmed that , indeed, my baby was dead I didn't know what to think. Was there something I did to cause this? What in the world happened? There were, and are, no answers. I am left now to pick up the pieces of my broken world and learn how to go on. Please contact me.

Email Address: werafamily@erols.com

Mary Ann Adams

Dec 14, 1997 · 17:43

I recently lost my second pregnancy to a parcial abruption & premature rupture of membranes in the 20th week of pregnancy. I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. The doctors said it was a late second trimester miscarrage, but to me I gave birth to a still born baby boy. We named him Paxton Cole. It is a great help in knowing where I can go to get help & know that My husband & I are not the only people in the world that have gone through such a terrible loss.

Email Address: padensmom1@aol.com

Stuart Nolley · from Austin

Dec 23, 1997 · 11:47

This is a quality web site and an even better organization. what a great resource for families who have lost children. We would like to add this site as a link on our Christian web site called SonLight (www.sonlight.com) that will also be included on our Christian dial-up product call SonDial. Thanks.

Email Address: snolley@mcslink.com

Pamela

Dec 31, 1997 · 17:28

You have a wonderful site! I found you through the Empty Arms webring!

Email Address: OurJaybird@aol.com